| 3. Get your guns out! There will be no police presence anywhere in the country. It will be every man for himself as we are told the minute the union cops walk off the job Americans start to plunder and steal. I know they do this in Chicago, but I didn't realize it was like that everywhere... I suggest getting the shotgun loaded and aimed out the window. As soon as anyone starts walking up the driveway just do what VP Biden tells his wife Jill - shoot twice! With a little luck you may hit a 24 point buck like the one John Kerry saw down on Cape Cod...
4. Start making bandages and get a bottle of whiskey ready. Obama predicts that first responders will be gone due to Sequestration. Nobody will be able to get medical help or get to a hospital. That is where the whiskey comes in. I always see guys drink whiskey when they are hurt in television movies. Certainly Hollywood wouldn't misguide us, would they? So if you get a toothache - take a slug of whiskey! If you stub your toe - a slug of whiskey! Hiccups - a slug of whiskey! Not sure what the bandages are for...I am guessing after all that whiskey you may end up falling down somewhere - keep the bandages close by! I am not sure what to tell women. I don't see them drink whiskey on tv when they get hurt - so I am not sure what to tell them now. This is further evidence of the sexist nature of our country...
5. Watch out for falling planes. Obama predicts that Air Traffic Controllers will all be fired if the sequestration goes thru. Logically, this means the third graders, who will obviously be put in charge, will have airplanes backed up from Boston to Tuskaloosa. No doubt when the planes start to run out of gas they will fall on your houses. This is bad. Go into the basement and hide under your storage cabinet full of 'Re elect Barack Obama' signs and bumper stickers.
6. Most importantly - cling to your guns and religion. It is better to go out of this world naive and with a feeling of senseless safety, rather than to endure what is about to happen when all hell breaks loose. Obama and SOD panetta tell us that the national defense will suffer terribly from these cuts. They are hinting that a small group of rambunctious girl scouts will be able to execute a coup d'etat on the USA if the cuts go through. Hold tight to those guns folks because cookie sales are down this year and the girl scouts are feeling entitled.
This is what we get when we try to cut the overinflated budget by a mere 2.5 percent. Predictions of chaos and calamity from the White House. Politicians are addicted to spending like a crack whore is addicted to ...well......crack! They can't stop! Even when a sitting President suggests it, as Obama did, it is still not a good idea. As for me - I have my supplies put aside and I am ready for the end of times.....Just the same way I was prepared for the inevitable Mad Cow disease, Y2K, Global Warming, Heaven's Gate, and every other nutcase doom and gloom scenario the stool-sniffing rump swabs in the Mainstream media love...
Up is down, good is bad, in is out, you know the liberal logic.... |
